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What The Hell Happened to Exene Cervenka?


Crazy Christine

Man, I thought she was cool and wise, I mean I saw her not long ago at the Los Angeles Library and I was applauding at everything she was saying… could I be totally wrong? Could she have turned totally nuts? Exene (Christine) Cervenka, of the iconic punk band X, now has  a YouTube channel with some of the weirdest videos you can imagine on the internet. Most of them show Exene as Christine Notmyrealname, conspiracy therapist, and if you dare to watch one of them, you are there for a weird ride going from everything-you-were-told-is-wrong to the-shit-will-hit-the-fan very soon. She goes on and on with the weirdest conspiracy theories out there, and honestly none of her rants about the end of the world, the soon-to-be-apocalypse and the mayhem (mostly because of Obama, Madonna or Lady Gaga) make sense,… I don’t understand shit of what is saying most of the time. A few weeks ago, I caught one of her tweets about the Sandy Hook tragedy being a hoax, a widely spread conspiracy theory apparently, and it abundantly shows up again among her liked videos. Apparently I am among the right audience target for the video below: I am a woman living in an urban area who believes all the lies of the government (not true), and when the apocalypse comes, jeezz it’s gonna be terrible especially since I don’t have a man around? What the hell is she talking about?

Now all this could be a complete joke, a parody, and I hope it is, but if Christine Notmyrealname is indeed a parody, Exene is really taking the high road on that one, as she has posted hundreds of these batshit crazy ramblings, and why the hell is she spending any time to watch stuff like ‘Sandy Hook hoax vs Reptilian Shapeshifters Alternative Media Epic Fail2264’? This gave birth to the craziest internet theories: she suffers from multiple sclerosis and the disease has attacked her brain, or this is a post-Andy Kaufman art project and you are stupid enough to buy it? May be she is trying to prove that the internet is going to make us believe anything and turn us all crazy?

Great! I am ready to believe this. However, she had an estate sale not a long time ago, because she is moving from California to Texas and declared to Rolling Stone: ‘Now when I think about California, I think of a liberal oppressive police state and regulations and taxes and fees. I’d rather go someplace and have my own little place out on the edge of town. I’m a country girl at heart. It makes me happy when I see people in Texas open-carrying. It makes me feel safe. I’m not even a gun owner, but I’d like to see a gun rack in every pickup truck, like my boyfriend had when I was fifteen years old in Florida. An armed society is a polite society.’ What? I give up to make sense of what this woman is saying… But may be she is right, when I was writing this, a 5.1 earthquake hit Los Angeles (actually we got three in a row)! Wow I should pack my things right away and move to Texas because the apocalypse is really pending.

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