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New Music Week Of August 31st, 2009: The Greatest Disappointment Of All

I Look To You – Whitney Houston
Million Dollar Bill – Whitney Houston
There was a time round “My Love Is Your Love” when WH had gone from divahood to iconhood. Not just the voice but the material, not just the funk but the ballads, not just the range but the timbre, and the legs and the looks. Well, it’s always lightest before the dark and here came Bobby Brown swingin‘ his dick and making it all his prerogative and there went Houston in one of the most spectacular meltdowns this side of Michael Jackson. And here she comes again on two songs that prove… I don’t know what they prove. The material is dreadful, the dance doesn’t swing, the ballad doesn’t test her range or whether she still has it or doesn’t. I expect naff lyrics, it comes with the territory, but I don’t expect this plodding ready for American Idol, cookie cutter crap. Bitterly disappointing.
(If You’re Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To –Weezer
I second just about everything the Frudzis said about Weezer in a post earlier today though after the thoroughly impressive “Troublemaker” and “Pork and Beans” the rest of the red album was a straight drag. “Want You To” is a rock solid pop rocker with a Cuomo proformo chorus and backing replete with hand claps and knee slaps but we know Weezer can maintain interest in a single. With the exception of the blue album and Pinkerton, when have they done it over an album. Single of the Week.
I Ain’t Hiding – The Black Crowes
You wanna hear the Black Crowes in 09 listen to My Morning Jacket, Jacket mine Southern rock and come out with sharp r&b boogie diamonds but the Crowes? I am so sick of the brothers: this plods, it strops, it wags its dick in your face like its Prince and wooohs in the background like its Mick Jagger. Next.
Oh My God (featuring Iggy Pop) – Ida Maria
Fallin‘ For You – Colbie Calliat
The End – Vivian Girls
This song is so good Ida deserves to remix, remake, and release it ad infinitum. Iggy sounds awesome. Colbie sounds like a thousand other, really, really good chick songwriters and looks like a gossip girl; the song is an inspired yet insipid nick of “man In The Mirror’. I have the same problem with Vivian Girls as I did the last time: they’re an average indie band with a brilliant drummer and “The End” is an average indie song with great harmonies and great drumming.
Don’t Panic – Coldplay
Cornerstone – Arctic Monkey’s
When Samer Diab asked me why there hasn’t been a stadium size band since U2 I shoulda pointed him towards these two enormously frothy narcolyptics. Coldplay have written one good song in two years, Arctic Monkeys about the same and neither of them are these. I am so dismissive of the once brilliant UK rock press because I couldn’t open a rag in England without reading the public fellating of these two completely awful rock bands…. Terrible stuff.
Raindrops – Basement Jaxx
Shut It Down (featuring Akon) – Pitbull
You can’t throw a brick without hitting Akon nowadays… I have been enjoying Pitbull all year but this doesn’t have the pop edge I expect from him. Finally, my pal Remy rates this duo and I’ve liked some of their remixes in the past but I’ve missed their albums completely. This is pretty good dub heavy (though not heavy heavy enough), vocals ordinary, and chorus catchy enough: but what makes it smarter than the average song is the synth holding down the melody line, going from classical runs to Human League 80s steals. Not bad.

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