Robin Gibb said he wanted "How Deep Is Your Love" to be played at his funeral. Fair enough to a limited degree but it got me to thinking what I wanted played at my funeral. I went with George Jones thoroughly miserable end of the marriage "A Good Year For The Roses". Why? Since most people there will be glad to see the back of me, I need them crying about something, anything!
I don't know how you can have a song, or a playlist, represent your life. The song that meant the most? That reflects your very being? A state of mind or (hopefully) transition. A farewell and Amen, or a celebration?
I took to my friends at the 45 Revolutions A Minute Facebook Group and my Facebook wall and asked the question. What do you want played at your funeral?
Dziga Vertov told this story: " I had a friend who passed in 1996 from cancer and months before he told me he made it his last wish that at his wake and funeral that his music be played. He deliberately chose the longest-ass version of one of his own tunes, with multiple solos and everything. I was the only person chuckling to myself, since I knew it was his sense of humor. A friend turned to me and said, "He did this to us on purpose, right?" I nodded. He replied, "Bless him."
And Sandy Skrinjaric included this wider view: "I was a social worker/grief counselor at hospice for 8 years and I had to help a lot of my patients plan their own funerals. The songs they chose most often were "In My Life" (I played that at my mom's funeral), "Wake Me Up When September Ends" (my 24 year old cousin was killed in September 09 and we played that at her funeral), "Good Riddance," and "Sand and Water" by Beth Nielsen Chapman, "Take It To The Limit," "Cancer" by My Chemical Romance, "Someday We'll Be Together." and "My Immortal" by Evanesence (their first album is pretty much a funeral soundtrack for goth kids)."
rock nyc Editor Helen Bach wanted the Sid Vicious version of "My Way" and, personally, I found that shocking because she has two cats so why does she want a song in which the main protagonists kills two of them?
Bill Holdship has given this some thought as well: "California Sun" and "Theme from the Magnificent 7"… Wooly Bully" and "A Fool Such As I". I'm gonna have more than two at mine. I want people to say: now this is a guy who knew how to have a good time through music. In the middle of my funeral mixtape, I'm going to record: "Don't I look just like myself?" And then follow it up later with Arnold saying: "I'll be back."
Marie Lynn said, ""A Son/Daughter" by Rilo Kiley, "Easy/Lucky/Free" by Bright Eyes, "Don't Look Back In ANger" by Oasis and "No Surprises" by Radiohead. They're more my f.u. to the world"
Patricia Goulding: "Golden Slumbers" and "Goodnight" by the Beatles. Need something else to get the party started after that."
Frank Schiazza: "Send In the Clowns"
Dalal Rosenzweig: "I agree with Frank"
Joseph McElroy: "Stardust" as sung by Nat King Cole
Rob Smith: "We lost a good friend to cancer last year, and at his memorial, his family played a playlist of a number of his favorite songs. It was the only time I've ever heard Fleetwood Mac's "Gypsy" in a church. For me, it'd be Lucinda Williams' "Sweet Old World," Natalie Merchant's "Life is Sweet," and "Wild Horses," by the Stones.
Patricia Goulding: "Golden Slumbers" and "Goodnight" by the Beatles. Need something else to get the party started after that."
Susan Whitall: "God Only Knows" and "Into the Mystic"
Anthe C. Rhodes: "I like the children's choir version of the first song. Some I sang to my dad when he asked me in the hospital. I'd have to think of a mix, but what comes to mind is some of what's been on my pages for my newest late best friend.
"Let It Be," "Across the Universe," Lennon's, "Love," "Angie," the closest song to my name. Some R.E.M., Miracle Legion, The 6ths and some Donovan, Buckley, and prettier VU or Madchester songs, like Ride's, "Vapour Trail."
Barbara Mastrodi-Lackey: "The Fabs will definitely have a place on my memorial mix (not to sound maudlin, but I guess one could think about what songs they'd want played when they go to the Great Hereafter). Also surprised no one's stated the obvious "Knocking on Heaven's Door" (but that's one I'd want as well)."
Warren Zevon covered "Knockin' On Heaven's Door" on his final album, The Wind. Recorded as his terminal illness ate him, the final song was "Keep me In Your Heart". I claimed I wanted the George Jones song and I do. But I want her to be thinking of this one: "If I leave you it doesn't mean I love you any less".