Good evening friends, The Big Huerta is on a much much needed vacation. I will be your writer and host of this week’s ARTicle . I will proceed to my hammy introduction in just a few sentences but first I would like to layout the ground rules if you will. Do not expect the immature style or the lame *ss attempt at humor or cracking wise in that mundane beat style of TBH. This will not float this week. I will …CBS SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN….CBS SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN…We are sorry to interrupt this article but we have just had a report that Elvis Presley, the king of rock and roll has been seriously wounded. Our sources report that Elvis was in the process of arriving at a “meet and greet” for some of his top fans in Dealey Plaza in Dallas this afternoon. We cannot comment on his condition until we receive further information…I have bits and pieces trickling in in my earpiece as I speak to you and I will try to relay the information…uh, once again the king of rock and roll, Elvis Presley, has been shot this afternoon in Dallas, Texas…we do know his wife, Priscilla Presley, was with him at this event…no word about her condition nor will we speculate upon her condition on this tragic occurrence that is going on right now in Dallas Texas… it is currently 12:35 in the afternoon Central Standard Time…okay…we have an eyewitness…can you put him on?? Will he talk?? No, okay…we have word from an eyewitness at the scene; a Harry??? A Lee Harry??? Harvey… a Mr. Lee Harvey Oswald, claims to have seen an elderly man leaning against a fire hydrant with a small handgun on the route of the Presley vehicle…he claims three shots were fired and the man was immediately wrestled to the ground by the Memphis Mafia…do we have a name??? Can we get a name?? I apologize folks, we are trying to bring you the latest breaking news on this tragedy as it unfolds…again, we have reports from Dallas, Texas that Elvis Presley has been assassinated during a fanclub meet and greet…As most of you know Elvis was riding a comeback of sorts after being in retirement for a number of years…He had just finished a two week run at The Astrodome in Houston and was going to play a private party for President Nixon at Camp David tomorrow night…I imagine all thoughts of that concert and any concert for that matter, will be postponed until further word on Presley’s condition. We are all in a state of shock at this moment…the entire world is in a state of shock…yes, yes, okay…you sure??? Can we give it out?? Okay…I have just received word on the name of the lone gunman that allegedly shot at Elvis Presley…A man that goes by the name of Lyndon Baines Johnson or LBJ as he is known here in these parts of Dallas…. apparently he is the head of the Texas-based Elvis Presley Fan Club here in Dallas…now we cannot confirm nor deny his involvement in this tragedy…but eyewitness accounts seem to point to this man…and that he was alone in his actions…Once again, a man named Lyndon Baines Johnson or LBJ has been arrested and is in the custody of the sure handed Dallas police force…one of the finer police forces in this country…they are truly representing very well, this wonderful state of Texas…uh…oh no…is this real??? Truly??…from Dallas Texas, the flash apparently official, the king of rock and roll, Mr. Elvis Aron Presley has died at 1:00 pm Central Standard time, 2 o’clock Eastern Standard Time…some 38 minutes ago..