When I was a wee slip of a lad, I remember dating in New York City as being hellish. By which I mean I couldn’t get a date despite there being more women than men in the city. Unfortunately for me, women had some standards in the 1980s.
In 2013, one of my best friends is having nothing but problems from the other side. Men want to sleep with her but nobody “DATES” any more and really, there are 2 girls for every guy as Brian Wilson once put it.
This seems to inflict many women, the dating drought, even indie rock star Marnie Stern: a cute enough and popular enough woman who should be getting her pick of the litter but instead is holding contests for a date with Marnie.
Kill Rock Stars put it together and I might have joined in the fun only I’d already panned The Chronicles Of Marnia (so let that be a lesson to all of us).
Anyway, I got this off something called noisey.vice.com . In Sunday’s Post, they interviewed Marnie who has been on two of the three dates (from 300 applicants) and liked one of them. Noisey think it is all in bad taste, I think it is kinda brave. And I may have to reassess her album though I certainly hope not.
Perhaps my friend should do the same thing, right? Post an application for dates? I’m gonna fill this one out myself though the contest is over because you can't be solipsistic enough… feel free to fill out yours and return to me and, well, I don't know what I'll do with it. Post it I guess.
Must enjoy "Law and Order", cute Jewish ladies, and petting dogs while eating chicken wings. Good sense of humor critical, doesn't mind his lady touring a lot, must live in New York, no drug addicts, creeps, stalkers, slackers, or vegans. Age, race, and religion: not a factor.
Please email all applications to datemarnieonreleasedate@gmail.com.
Name: Iman Lababedi
Email:imancharif@aol.com
Age: 56
Location: nyc
Height:5’3”
Are you gainfully employed? Elaborate.Yes, at advertising agency (trust me, rock nyc does not translate to gainful employment)
When/how long was your last relationship? Last year/2 years
What are your hobbies/interests? Music, sports, reading, theater, movies and anything to do with PG Wodehouse, Emily Bronte, Vladimer Nabakov and Phillip K. Dick (I might throw in CS Lewis but just in case she is into S&M and can read between the lines)
What qualities do you most enjoy in a woman? Sense of humor (by which I mean laughs at my jokes) good taste in music and please no drama
List any anti-depressants you currently take: none
What do you know about Marnie and why do you want to date her? Listened to her albums, haven’t seen her live yet, kinda panned the last one, actually. I like distance in a relationship.
What would your most recent ex-girlfriend say about you? Can we get her email? She would say she still loves me and yes.
Where would you take Marnie on a first date and why? Smith And Wollensky’s and any excuse for their prime rib