ELO are a British band, I know this cuz I randomly emailed the boss one day to ask- I had no idea it’s not like they have pronounced accents or anything.To put this in perspective on your local radio you were listening to “Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head”, by BJ Thomas and your parents were still rocking out to Glen Campbell. Squaresville in double knit trousers.
Americans were eating TV dinners in foil trays (mm Salisbury steak!) and in your driveway you most likely had a Chevy.
It’s now 2012 and to this day you’ll hear my friends groan “Oh God.. she’s in ELO mode” and I curse you Spotify for showing up on my Facebook to advise my friends of it. I have always been a fan of ‘violin rock’ there is something powerful about the orchestral element of music that 2 guitars a bass and drum just can’t hit. Nothing against that raw sound but sometime it’s pretty amazing to get more for my buck.
ELO’s Greatest Hits 1986 was a guilty pleasure that I played when my cool friends were too fucked up to notice what was going on in their ears. Starting out with the strain of “You Made a Fool Of Me…” from ‘Evil Woman’ this ‘greatest hits album is nonstop guilty pleasure. I won’t even like as people were strewn across my floor this played as I cleaned up and it was full blast. See I can’t understand why I was the only one in my peer group to dig them. I recall my youth with these songs (unlike 86 at the age of 20) I can remember songs “Telephone Line” with its electronic twitter call intro- yeah sorta corny now but one hell of a sing along. ‘have you been alright through all those lonely lonely lonely nights…” You can actually hear the quasi desperation in Jeff Lynne’s voice- the strings are amazing in this tune. “I just can’t believe, they’ve all faded out of view”. What is wrong with this world that they can’t find the cool in this tune?
Shall I even hit “Mr. Blue Sky” again? I think this could well be the song I have written most about. The tempo, the lyrics the ‘huhu huhu’ pant is so dynamic that I don’t think I could survive a week without hearing this tune.
“Where did we go wrong?” Dang could well be my favorite song of all time, depending on what day it is.
“Strange Magic”, a slower and incredibly 70’s sounding tune this one is not so wonderful lyrically but instead musically. What the hell instruments are those, cuz if it were released today that would be a Mac. Yet we are talking 30+ years ago… this is real live synth magic and what resembles the tone of a plucky metal comb. I especially love the drum on this one, it sounds so dated it’s like an old 8mm friend. “Sweet dream…”
“Sweet Talkin’ Woman” is just kitsch in a can. The sing back is hilarious and I can remember way too clearly standing on the counter in my 1 room apartment belting out this tune “I better get back to you…”, why I was on the counter is beyond me but in writing this column I realized that I stand on furniture an counters a lot- maybe I missed my calling as a go go dancer or something ‘communication breakdown all around….’
“Livin’ Thing”, STRINGS and HORNS! Hell yes!!! This is the driving tune on the lp. The backup singers are awful but if I join them, it sounds much better. “higher and higher baby’… I have no idea why this song reminds me of the old Times Square- you know the one that you could catch VD from walking down? Not the Disneyland it’s become. I must have had it in my head as I ran through that area at one point in my early stomping days. See it was safest to play ELO in your head back then, the kids just don’t get it when they’re rockin out to The Germs.
“Can’t Get It Out of My Head” is a slowed down sad sack of a tune “ I saw the oceans daughter…’wtf is he talking about? He’s sad- someone go hug him.
“Turn To Stone”, ‘ the city streets are empty now..’, the only redemption here is the beat and hmm listen with earphones.. did Blondie rip off that electronic bass beat for “heart of glass”, go on ,go listen. I’ll wait… It’s possible.
But Im not ass kisser cuz there are a couple tunes that suck so bad that if I had heard them before the others I would think ELO the shittiest band ever “Showdown?” what the fuck is that crap? “Rockaria!” other than when the singer goes ‘oops’ at the beginning is pretty much crap. Its like progressive wanna be 50s vomit on a flatbed truck just God awful. Jeff, ya aint Jerry Lee. “Ma Ma Ma Belle” starts off well and good than tanks like a bad dream. Jeff, ya aint Queen.
So there ya go- a kick ass album from 1986 with just a good enough awesome to suckage ratio to make it worth the $7.99, or stream on Spotify but all your friends will know ya did it- and there goes your cool factor.