There has been a whole lot of hyping up of the CBGB film A chronicle of famed Hily Kristal and his hovel of heroin. CBGB was THE place in New York City’s Bowery where anyone who was no one hung out and looked cool.
The film takes us in comic book style through the inception and success of the famed club. I thnk we were supposed to be watching this through the view of Punk magazine but there were some major issues. First off every actor in that film must have been reading cue cards. I have never heard more monotone recitation since my junior year college psych class. Drone is one thing- reading is another and unfortunately this rustled the flow of what could have been a fun movie.
I did get a few laughs out of it. Most for Ron Weasley (Rupert Grint) playing Cheetah Chrome. *Spoiler.. you get to see Grint’s ass. But the Sara Silverman inspired Ashley Greene who played Hilys daughter Lisa, was so poorly obnoxious that I cant beleieve she actually had a part in the film creation- is she supposed to be acting cool?
So on to the 1-2-3 etc fast review.. here we go
1- Joey Ramone was way cuter and way more articulate than the character in this film
2- Worse lip syncing in a motion picture award goes toooo….
3- Hillys mother was a caricature, we all know a sassy old Jew broad- this was near parody
4- NOT ENOUGH LEGS McNEIL
5- The infamous filth pit restroom was the star of the film
I laughed- alot, there are some legit funny bits in the movie but the shit acting and awful editing (at times its a bit woozy like seriously this was all filmed on someones shoulder) stole any chance of me liking the movie. I clock watched hoping for an ending soon. Oh and the Lou Reed segment- sucked so bad that its as accurate I would want it to be since I despise Lou Reed.
But if you’d never been to the club- you’ll love this for the ‘cool factor’ but if youd ever dodged dog poo or stepped up to that thrown on wobbly drunk legs- your memories are more vibrant than this film could ever be, keep them untainted.