Today we are inaugurating a new column: “This Wheel’s On Fire”: an advise column where our very own Helen Bach will give heartfelt, compassionate and useful advise to those in need. Here is our inaugural question. Ples forward me your questions at “imancharif@aol.com” and I will get them to Helen.
Question:
Dear Wheels,
my girlfriend just doesn’t like my lovin’ anymore. As Costello said walkin’ on water isn’t making me a miracle man and like the righteous brothers said she’s lost that lovin’ feelin and it’s gone, gone, gone.
I love everything about her, I want my arms around her and I’m so hot for her and she’s cold.
I wanna kill myself. What can I do?
Lovelorn In Louissiana.
Helen replies:
Dear Lovelorn In Louisianna.
“Lovin”? What are you Patrick Fuckin’ Dempsey?
Helen Bach