Father's Day Too Late: Some Thoughts on Fatherhood And A Playlist
I get fucked on national celebrations all life long, July 4th or Christmas, Hanukah, Ramadan, Easter, Memorial Day: none of them mean a damn thing to me.
But you'd think Father's Day would, right? I mean, I have no kids of my own, but I must have had a Dad, right? Right. He died in 1973. Grandpa's? One dead some 50 years before I was born, the other dead in 1966 when I was 9 years old.
OK, but I must have been a father's figure to someone? Apparently not!
So "Father's Day" is just another shrug of the shoulders.
Though it always hit me that father's were much less organically attuned to parental affiliation. How much, I wonder, is social? I was speaking to my friend Michael Blauner, who has two daughters, and his explanation for what it is, was obtuse. The depth of feeling, he seemed to say, was simply beyond words. But it was beyond the longing and love of son's for their father's. It was a mix of intense responsibility with extreme attachment.
This I believe though I can't imagine it and I have a good imagination.
1. Don't Cry Daddy – Elvis Presley – Written by Mac Davis, a syrupy heartbreaker. Makes you wanna have a vasectomy.
2.My Heart Belongs To Daddy – Ella Fitzgerald – Ooooh, now I'm happy. I have been a sugar daddy at least… that must count! i prefer Marilyn…
3. Daddy's Little Girl – Brian Wilson – After a lifetime of dating little girl's in Greil Marcus's immortal words, only to validate his honor, here Brian validates his honor through love of family.
4. Oh! Daddy, Oh! – Charlotte Gainsbourg – Charlotte has claimed to be clueless as to the incestuous overtones (no subtext here folks), daddy Serge had a different kind of honor.
5. Daddy I'm Fine – Sinead O'Connor – Turn of the century Sinead peaked one more time. A great, great stomper as Sinead remembers leaving her family and "making her own living singing".
6. Hey Daddy (Daddy's Home) – Usher – Off his Raymond Vs Raymond, but Usher couldn't sustain a serious look at family life, or divorce, no Here, My Dear this. Still, pretty good.
7. My Three Sons – Elvis Costello – Nobody doubts his sincerity, in this ode to his children. No, we doubt his ABILITY. This is so personal, it's nauseating. "I love you more than I can say, what I give to one the other can't take away." I'm gonna throw up.
8. . Father And Son – Cat Stevens – lovely song, this is a pretty good take on the aging process. Written by a very young Yusef Islam.
9. Father And Daughter – Paul Simon – He was real good at capturing parental love, "St. Judy's Comet" for his son, comes to mind. This one is better, just lovely and it Includes the beautiful line where he is guarding the door of his daughter's bedroom in case there is something scary hiding under her bed, Paul is gonna "Stand guard like a postcard of a golden retriever, and never leave till I leave you with a sweet dream in your head".
10. Father Of Mine – Everclear – Fucked up relationships, fucked up families.
It was father's day, wasn't it?
