Four years ago rock nyc was a much looser place than it is now, not only did we have more energy but we were also convinced nobody was reading us and were free to write any piece of silliness we felt like. One memorable day, Mike Nessing, Helen Bach and I spent a day writing as many posts as we could think up reaching an astonishing 32!!
Those days are long gone now however, just for old times sake, here is the sort of silliness we do from time to time: I’m gonna change the n word for the word jerkie on Jay Z’s “Nigga What, Nigga Who”… Enjoy…
Jerkie what, Jerkie who
Jerkie what, Jerkie who
Switcha flow, getcha dough
Can’t fuck with this Roc-a-Fella shit doe
Switcha flow, getcha dough
Can’t fuck with this Roc-a-Fella shit doe
[Verse 1: Jay-Z]
Motherfuckers wanna act loco
Hit em with numerous
Shots with the fo’-fo’
Faggots wanna talk to po-po’s
Smoke em like cocoa
Fuck rap, coke by the boatload
Fuck that on the run-by, gun high, one eye closed
Left holes through some guy clothes
Stop your bullshit
Glock with the full clip
Motherfuckers better duck when the fool spit
One shot could make a Jerkie do a full flip
See the Jerkie laying shocked when the bullet hit
Oh hey ma, how you know niggas wanna buy you
But see me I wanna fuck for free like Akinyele
Take this ride, make you feel it inside your belly
If it’s tight get the K-Y Jelly
All night get you wide up inside the telly
Side to side, til you say Jay-Z you’re too much for me
[Hook]
(Jerkie what?) Make you think you can fuck with me
(Jerkie who?) Recognize girl, Jay to the Z
(Jerkie what?) Make you think you can fuck with me
(Jerkie who?) Recognize girl, Jay to the Z
(Jerkie what?) Make you think you can fuck with me
(Jerkie who?) Recognize girl, Jay to the Z
(Jerkie what?) Make you think you can fuck with me
(Jerkiewho?) Recognize bitch, Jay to the motherfuckin’ Z
[Verse 2]
Got a condo with nothing but condoms in it
The same place where the rhymes is invented
So all I do is rap and sex imagine how I stroke
See how I was flowing on my last cassette
Rapid-fire like I’m blasting a Tec, never jam though
Never get hot, never run out of ammo
Jerkies hating and shit cause I slayed your bitch
You know your favorite, I know it made you sick
And now you’re, acting raw but you never had war
Don’t know how to carry your ho, wanna marry your ho
Now she’s mad at me cause Your Majesty
Just happened to be a pimp – what a tragedy
She wanted, us to end cause I fucked her friends
She gave me one more chance and I fucked her again
I seen her tears as she busted in
I said shit
There’s a draft
Shut the door bitch and come on in
[Hook]
[Verse 3]
Got a vendetta even though I been better
Left him in the cold with a thin sweater
Rap Jerkies on Prozac get the bozack, Jerkies threw
Two at me I threw fo’ back, hold that
Let the dough stack
Way before Big had the gold Ac
Dame had the Lex black
Motherfuckers wanna test that, stress that
And right where you’re stressed at, where you rest at
I suggest that Jerkies invest in a vest when I come through
With the Glock jet black you Jerkies step back
I’m the best at you know I ain’t no apprentice to this
Me and my Jerkies we invented the shit
I came into the business with this
The Originator, none greater
Jaz-O finish this shit
[Verse 4 – Big Jaz]
Better learn
Jaz’ll relax that, ever heard of me
Worldwide Originator say word to me
The population holla certainly
I burn a Jerkie like a third degree
See me shine so bright
Jerkie I’m my light, running ruling with rigor and vigor
Nobody bigger than me and my Jerkie Jigga
You fly-by-nights stop chirpin B
Heavyweight’s light work for me
For the time in this motherfucker ain’t nobody hurting me
What, cut your face in like surgery
Who the fuck got a VS
Fucking BM’s on the road
When you had to be in bed at the PM
Need the info, Jaz on the C-N-N
Forever touching my work is beginning you’re endin
Jerkie your style’s no style my style’s hostile
C’mon, faggot Jerkie down to take the gun home
The O-RI-GI-NA-TOR