Pigeons And Rock Stars: A Modest Proposal by Iman Lababedi, Helen Bach and Mary Magpie

Yesterday rock nyc editress (?) Helen Bach wrote a post about Kings Of Leon leaving the stage three songs into their set because a pigeon took a poop in their bass players mouth (or head… depending on who you believe.)

Which got us to thinking……

My friend Emily, who dates a somewhat famous rock star, gets mad at us because we treat other people’s lives as our entertainment and she has a point… but it is so hard to resist.

So with apologies to Emily and musicians all over the planet (well, mostly UK and US)…
ROCK STARS WHO SHOULD HAVE A PIGEON CRAP IN THEIR MOUTHS:

Iman sez:

1. Bono – It is tim for the Saint of making his audience feel like shit about themselves more than deserves to have some of his own medicine

2. Lou Reed – He is an arrogant asshole, has done anything worth hearing in year Except making his concert at a frequency only dogs can here. Bring the bird.

3. Hayley Williams – What a smug little prig. And she is so mean to the boys in the band.

4. Michael Stipe and Natalie Merchant – One pigeon, two idiots…

5.Jack White – For that godawful “Mother nature’s Son” if nothing else.

6. jon Bon Jovi –  So that was $2,000 not to meet Jon but you get to take the chair home? There is a pigeon here Mr. Bon Jovi and no, he won’t pay you $2,000. Just open your mouth please, a little wider.

7. Stephen Jeurzaks jackass manager -I could look up how to spell his name but nah…

Helen sez:
Bob Segar, Nickelback, Lifehouse, the Fray, Paramore, Kesha (though she would like it, rub it on herself and lick it off) as would Nikki Mange or would they lick it off eachother for publicity..

Live, Bon Jovi, Jack Johnson, The Cast of Glee, The Rolling Stones(feel sorta bad cuz theyre so old though),Madonna, Green Day, Phish, OAR, Stained, Seether, Train, Maroon 5,
I could go on for days really….

Mary sez:
Paramore, Meg and Dia, Miley Cyrus

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