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Weezer Thank God For Girls With A Cannoli Orgy

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‘Don’t play with your food!’, used to tell us our grandmothers, it was a question of having respect for something that used to be scarce and expensive, but in these times of abundance who cares? Still, playing with food can look disgusting for some weird reasons, and in any case, it looks childish, immature,… just like this new Weezer song? Exactly!

Weezer released a video for ‘Thank God for Girls’, but two days ago, the always enthusiastic Rivers Cuomo had this to say about the new song:

‘Oh my god you guys, the new single is amazing! After we played it last night, I turned to my plus one and said, with glee, “it’s no Back to the Shack!! Hands down Thank God for Girls is the far, far better song. I’m no music critic but I have no problem sharing my opinion on this.

I will say the band seems to be putting their all into it. There’s a spoken intro that reminded me of “Miss Sweeney” and a really pretty classic Weezer guitar driven melody. And Scott plays the keyboard on parts of it. I love the abrupt acapella ending, it showcases my voice.

The lyrics sound pretty out there and remind me of my tumblr work. Very unique, very different, a bit dark. (I especially love the Adam lyric parts) … that last line is gold.

I’m not a huge fan of rapped out sections in songs but there’s a lot of cool work going on here with harmonies. I think the music is really great, I’m a huge fan of organs being used and piano in the verse.
It’s a perfect mix of weezer past and future. The chorus soars on melodic wings. It rocks sooooo hard. I can’t really compare it to anything specific we’ve ever done. But I can’t wait for more!

I think this may be a big hit single. I hope I’m not overselling it but I think it’s great! (adventurous, brave, fun, compelling, rocking, and I just LOVE it.)

I love this song, I love weezer, and I love you! =w= OCTOBER 13!!! BUCKLE UP, HERE WE GO!

River Cuomo’

I don’t know about this ‘big hit single’ but one thing is sure, Rivers Cuomo is still this school boy tortured and emasculated by girls although crying for more and screaming his lust and fear at the same time over a power pop chorus, … well, nothing new there… ‘In a battle for supremacy and access to females glued to the TV/And even if you are victorious you may receive many cuts, bruises, and scrapes/And you will require band aids and antiseptic ointments/And tender loving kisses on your stab wounds and when you come home/She will be there waiting for you with a fire in her eyes/And a big fat cannoli to shove in your mouth’…

As for the video, it is one difficult to stomach, what were they thinking? If the cannoli are only mentioned in the first part of the song, they are gonna haunt you for a while if you watch this entire video. Saying it’s disgusting is an understatement, the guy shove cannoli to his face during the entire song with the help of a sexy girl, and it gets very disgusting, very dirty and very sinful, as the whole scene is supervised by a holy Jesus painting. It has to be a metaphor for sex, or at least how Rivers feels for sex? What could be such an enjoyable experience, eating pastry or having sex, turns very fast into a mess and an impossible task. Plus, the chorus is hilarious ‘She’s so big/
She’s so strong
/She’s so energetic in her sweaty overalls/Thank God for girls’… What are you afraid of Rivers? Of these damn half-Japanese girls?

The best part of the story is that Rivers Cuomo, or at least I am ready to believe it is him, has annotated the song himself on Genius:

‘I’m so jealous of the hooker-uppers
Seems like it’s so easy to get laid now
all these good looking atheletic young guys
r getting so much free sex
it kills me
laxitutes.
Such a bummer. Such a bummer.
To be evaluated by women. To be graded. To be rated.
Where do I stand? How big? How strong? How enduring? How energetic? How inventive?
So sad that it comes to this. So sad.
It IS a competition and I AM being compared.’

Poor guy, he probably feels like the guy with cannoli cream all over the face in the video, there’s too much pain, disgust and guilt in the visuals to enjoy the song, but the fact that he took the time to hammer the self-deprecation on Genius, makes me wonder: is he making fun of him or of us? Has Weezer turned into a caricature of Weezer?

PS: their cover picture, featuring the Pope is as crazy and blasphemous as the rest.

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