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Coachella 2020 Is A Masterful Festival, Governors Ball Should Be Half As Good

Frank Ocean Panorama

 

Bob Lefsetz isn’t always wrong but he can be extremely wrong about modern pop because he doesn’t like it, he doesn’t follow it, and his opinion is always second hand. I disagree with him about, say, the disastrous Toto and the way, way, way overrated Elton John, but he has valid opinions because he has listened (that is my sole criteria and still the vast majority of people fail it before spewing). This is what Lefsetz had to say about the 2020 Coachella: “But read the second line of the lineup (www.coachella.com) Do you know who each of these acts is? Have you even heard their names? Read below that and it’s gobbledygook, some names stick out, but most are unknown!…”

I think this is nonsense, 2020 is among the best years they’ve ever had and there isn’t a festival anywhere that begins to compete with it. But can I prove it? I am going to grade every act from 0 (if I don’t know em) and 5 (the Frank Oceans) and divide it by the 175 performers and let’s see. If I feel inspired I may add a comment..See you at the bottom (where I admit there are lots of names I don’t know) (oh and I researched none while writing this)…

Coachella — 2020 Lineup

(Sandy) Alex G – Major lo fi buddy of Frank Ocean – 3

100 gecs – hippest hip hop collective ever – 4

21 Savage – 4

88rising’s Double Happiness – 3

Adam Port – 0

Alec Benjamin – 2

Ali Gatie – 0

Altın Gün – 0

Amber Mark – 0

Amyl and the Sniffers – 3

Anitta – Puerto Rican urban music star – 4

ANNA – 0

Anna Calvi – 3

Ari Lennox – 2

Aya Nakamura – 0

BADBADNOTGOOD – 2

Banda MS 2

beabadoobee – 2

Beach Bunny – 1

Beach Goons – 0

Bedouin – 2

Big Sean – 5

Big Wild – 0

BIGBANG – 0

Bishop Briggs – 1

black midi – UK mathrock – 4

Black Pumas -3

Black Coffee – 0

BROCKHAMPTON – 4

Calvin Harris – 4

Caribou – 3

Cariño – 0

Carly Rae Jepsen – 4

Cashmere Cat – 3

Channel Tres -3

Charli XCX – 4

Chelsea Cutler – 2

Chicano Batman – 0

Chris Liebing – 0

City Girls – with JT out of prison, this is a huge gig for them – 5

Code Orange – 3

Conan Gray – 0

Crumb – 0

Cuco – 0

DaBaby – 4

Damian Lazarus – 0

Daniel Caesar – 3

Danny Elfman – – The film scorer – 4

Daphni – 3

Dave – 3

Denzel Curry – 3

Detlef – 0

Disclosure – 3

Dixon – 0

DJ Koze – 0

DJ Lord – 0

Doja Cat – one of the best new rappers out there, a must see – 5

Dom Dolla – 0

Duck Sauce – 2

Duke Dumont – 0

Ed Maverick- 0

ela minus – 0

Ellen Allien – 0

Emo Nite – We get these emo parties at Webster Hall all the time – 3

Emotional Oranges – 0

Epik High – 0

Erick Morillo – 0

Ezra Collective – UK neo-jazz crossover rap collective – 4

Fatboy Slim – 3

FKA twigs – 5

Floating Points 0

Flume – 2

Fontaines D.C. – 3

Frank Ocean – 5

Freddie Gibbs & Madlib – 3

Friendly Fires – 3

GG Magree – 0

girl in red – o

Giselle Woo & The Night Owls – 0

GRiZ – 0

Guy Laliberté – 0

Hatsune Miku – 0

Hayden James – 2

Hot Chip -3

IDLES – 3

Inner Wave – 0

J.I.D – 3

Jai Wolf – 3

Jayda G – 0

Jessie Reyez – 5

Joji – 0

Kim Petras – though I wasn’t crazy about her opening for Troye Sivan – 4

King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard – 4

Koffee – 4

Kruder & Dorfmeister -0

Kyary Pamyu Pamyu – 0

Kyle Watson – 0

Kynda Black – 0

L’Impératrice – 0

Lana Del Rey – 5

Lane 8 – 0

Lauren Daigle – Christian contemporary singer! – 2

Ленинград (Leningrad) – 0

Lewis Capaldi – 3

Lil Nas X – 5

Lil Uzi Vert – 5

Lost Kings – 0

Louis The Child 0

Luttrell – 0

Madeon – 0

Malaa – 0

Mannequin Pussy – 3

Mariah the Scientist – 0

Marina – as in Marina And The Robots – 2

Masego – 0

Matoma – 0

Megan Thee Stallion – 5

Melé – 0

MIKA – 2

Monolink – 0

Mura Masa – 0

NIKI = 0

Nilüfer Yanya – 0

Noname – 5

Olivia O’Brien – 0

Omar Apollo – 0

ONYVAA – 0

Orville Peck – 3

Pabllo Vittar – 0

Paco Osuna – 0

Peggy Gou – “Peggy Gou is a Berlin-based South Korean DJ, record producer, and fashion designer”… I did not know that – 0

Pink Sweat$ – 3

Princess Nokia – 4

PUP – 4

Rage Against the Machine -5

Raveena – 0

Rex Orange County – 4

Rich Brian – 3

Roddy Ricch – FYI, has Spotify’s most played song as I write (on Sunday 1-5-20) – 4

Run The Jewels – 3

Sahar Z – 0

Sama’ – 0

Sampa The Great – 2

Sara Landry – 0

Sasha Sloan – 4

Satori –

SebastiAn – His new album is terrific (i meant to see him last week and completely forgot) (the only artist I looked up, I thought they might have meant Peggy Lou) – 4

Seun Kuti & Egypt 80 – 0

Skegss – 0

SLANDER – 0

Sleaford Mods – 4

slowthai – 4

Snail Mail -4

Steve Lacy -4

Summer Walker – 4

Swae Lee – 3

Tchami – 0

Testpilot – 0

The Chats – 0

The Comet Is Coming – 0

The HU – 0

The Martinez Brothers – 0

The Murder Capital – 0

The Regrettes – 2

Thom Yorke | Tomorrow’s Modern Boxes – 5

Tiga – 0

TNGHT – 2

TOKiMONSTA – 0

Travis Scott – 5

Viagra Boys 2

VNSSA – 0

Weyes Blood – 3

Whipped Cream – 0

Yaeji –
YBN Cordae -with Juice WRLD dead, the best young rapper out there – 5

YUNGBLUD – 4

OK, 175 acts, 307 points, an average of 1.76 per artist BUT, while there I don’t know more than half of the acts are unknown to me (94 to be precise), 19 of the acts got a “5” -by which I mean are must sees. And 27 are “4”‘s which means are pretty darn good and 45 are “3” -which means you should catch em. On a daily basis that is 30 sets more than worth your time… Only Glastonbury offers better odds…

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